Friday, February 15, 2008
Friday, February 15, 2008
I must say that I felt almost out of place. Like as if there was this invinsible plastic wall that was blocking me from the rest. Well, I can easily blame it on my 'resignition' from the debate scene, and going down for viewing isnt going to revive my mind once again to 'argument' gear. or analytic gear whatsoever.
Just walking around, peeping into each debate room and feeling the familiar shivers of excitement and anticipation once again did make me long and maybe even pine to be back in the debate areana. A couple of familiar faces here and there, and the continuous clapping and scrapping of chairs for points-of-information.
The girls did well. Great to say the least. Their first round in A Div, now Division I, against UWS and they won by a unanimous decision. :) Well done girls, well done. And surprise surprise, dear Nicole Mao was adjucating, well probably shadow adjucating, but still! To think that 5 years ago we were wondering "what in the world are adjucators? such a big name" and even having the thought that maybe, maybe one day we'll be at that position, taking down notes, rating speaker after speaker and giving off comments and advice. She's done it :)
Yes yes, i've always been a tiny bit jealous of her even during our secondary school years. Call it... competetiveness or childishness yet even when each of us spoke, I guess for me I've always wanted to be the best speaker. Up till now, I'll never be really sure if I should have continued debating, DSA-ed to ACJC, basically the well trodden and safe path instead of venturing off into the unknown jungle, trying to slay dragons and beasts that ive never seen in my life. My english has never been brilliant like how most 'Top 10 speakers' are. Yes, I've been disappointed, I am still disappointed and suppose will/may still be upset at one point or another with my standard as well as how i carry myself. I've always wondered if I was capable enough to be a well received debater and even an adjucator. No, I dont see myself vying for a spot in the World Debating Championship like Rachael Quah(tmr's the trials) but maybe, maybe I'll be good enough to be a decent judge. I dont know. :)
There's so many things thats in my mind left unanswered only that most of the time I dont say it or speak of it. Sigh. Frustrating sometimes.
Is this pride? Once again I'm left with an "I-Don't-Know" answer.
